Is Being Courteous Out of Date?

Yesterday I had a strange experience and even 24 hours after, I still don't understand what happened. I was pulling out of an unnamed parking lot on the Shenandoah campus. Another car was also pulling out across the lot from mine and since I was turning right, I had the right-of-way. They were turning left, and I waved them on to go, because I am such a nice person. The person across from me didn't go, so I let off the brake to make my turn. Of course, as soon as I did so, the person across from me did the same thing. I stopped, waved again, and motioned for them to go on. They proceeded to respond by giving me the middle finger out of their window and waving their hand frantically in front of their face, telling me to make the turn. I went, but my brain couldn't process what had just happened.

I was trying to be polite. Why was my politeness being rewarded with an obscene gesture and rude waving? I had no idea. Then I started thinking. Is there even a point to being nice or courteous anymore, especially in traffic situations? Probably not. It seems that niceness is always rewarded with nothing...sometimes even worse than nothing in my case. What has changed over time to make people rude?

I believe rudeness is a learned behavior. From the time we are born, we as humans see how our parents, friends, and siblings interact with others. Watching these interactions is how we learn to interact as well. If the behavior we are watching isn't pleasant and it is repeated behavior, we learn that this is perfectly ok. Sure, once we are adults, we know that acting rude isn't ok, but since the behavior is learned, it's hard to change.

This article gives advice for parents trying to tame their child's rude or uncivilized behavior. Unfortunately they don't give many details on how the adults or parents should act, but how they should redirect the children's rudeness and teach them how to act. This is a great start, but where are the guides for how the parents should act? The old saying "Do as I say, not as I do," applies here. Many parents are extremely rude to cashiers, janitors, and people with jobs that are not so high up on the social rank. When their children see this behavior, they think it's fine to belittle or ignore those people since their parents did it.

In today's fast-paced society, sometimes it's hard to be civil, especially when you're juggling a full-time job, two kids, a mortgage payment, and going to school (in no means am I referring to myself...I only have one child). Nonetheless, it absolutely does not give you the right to be rude or uncivilized to others. I made a list of small things that a person can do to be less rude during their day. Some people don't even realize they are being rude to others because their mannerisms are branded into their brain.

1. When being waited on by a cashier or sales associate, whether it's Wal-Mart or Saks Fifth Avenue, be courteous by NOT talking on your cell phone and ignoring the person ringing your purchase. Try to make small talk (weather, talk about what you're buying, etc) or possibly compliment them on something to evoke a smile...a compliment never hurt anyone and it can make someone's day SO much better even if it's just a "Your hair looks great!"

2. If someone waves you on in traffic, lets you slide in front of them, etc...give them the friendly hand wave or acknowledge that they have done a good deed. It's good karma.

3. If you see an older person struggling with bags, a heavy object, etc...HELP THEM. I see so many people go ignored in grocery stores because they can't reach something on a higher shelf or because the cashier has made their bags to heavy for them to lift into their car. I always try to help when I can and I'm always rewarded with a smile and a big Thank you. These acts of kindness make you feel good about yourself as well.

4. If someone is being rude to you, counteract their rudeness with a big smile and be as polite as you can. Don't be rude back because 1) it is teaching that person that being rude is ok because people will put up with it and 2) You look bad when you are rude...being rude is not a pretty trait to have.

I think by doing these four simple things, it not only helps you become a better person, but it helps others feel better about themselves as well. If every person would do one good deed a day or rethink their decision to yell and scream at the customer service associate from Verizon because they feel their bill was too high this month, people in general would be happier. It's that easy.

I'll leave you with a funny yet true link that has 16 steps on How To Be Nice.

JCP...Or Is It JCPenny?

JCPenny has a new look, new prices, and an overall new attitude towards retail. Heck, they aren't even called JCPenny anymore. JCP is the new department store that has lower prices, no hassle returns, and a lot more color than the old, bland JCPenny. Why the change? What makes this "new" store better? I took a trip to the Hagerstown Valley Mall to find out if it is worth all of the buzz that has been going around about it.

Upon first arriving into the store, I immediately noticed the freshly painted signs that graced the entrance. I found this welcoming because before, the JCPenny was decrepit and looked like it had been around since the beginning of time. My eyes were also averted to the colorful boxes and displays of clothing they had placed strategically around entrance to the store. Mannequins were decked out in bright oranges, yellows, aquamarines, and blindnig whites in different patterns. This created a feeling of a sunny day on the beach in my mind which is a good mindset to have, especially when shopping and spending money.

After walking through the bottom half of the store, I found it to be pleasing to the eye as well as to the wallet. Their prices are much lower but they still have the same brands they have always carried. Their new signage is brightly colored, easy to read, and fun to look at. There are poles separating each section such as girls, boys, toddlers, juniors, etc. Each of the poles are painted different colors and are labeled with what the section holds. This makes it extremely easy to find what you are looking for. I remember in the old JCPenny, I spent 20 minutes trying to find the petites section so I could buy a dress for a wedding. The old store was disorganized and hard to navigate. Pricing is also a plus in this new and improved department store.

The signs for pricing are labeled well and on each rack as it should be. Before, JCPenny has single price tags on each separate item, making the shopper have to work to find the price (which may not even be correct because a sticker was wrongly put on an item). Now, the items are clearly labeled and without the .99 after the leading number. This creates a new shopping experience because not only can shoppers add the amount they are spending in their head, sales associates can easily calculate the sale price of an item without a calculator (assuming JCPenny doesn't hire five year olds) when asked. I'd much rather see a sign reading "$7 Socks" than "$6.99 Socks" because it seems easier and to the point.

Upstairs, JCP keeps the housewares. I found this section to be inviting as well with signage hanging from the ceiling in a well kept way, labeling different items throughout the top half of the store. Their displays were better advertised with more color and less sale signs blocking the product. This is a great tactic to attract buyers because the buyers can see where items are and pick out what they are looking for with ease, giving them more time to browse when a certain display happens to catch their eye.

All in all, I think the new JCPenny is a great department store who has updated not only the physical appearance, but the feeling that shoppers get upon entering and browsing the items. It has a Target-esque appeal that I love and although some say it "cheapens" the store, I believe it adds value and creates a customer-store bond.

This is an article written by Jim Edwards about the JCPenny logo, it's history, and his opinion on if it is going to help or hurt the company. JCPenny Adopts New Logo -- It's 3rd In As Many Years. The comments below the article are rather harsh towards the new logo. I find the new logo simple and it's effective. The colors stand for the American flag (red, white, blue) and it still says JCP which is what many valued customers call JCPenny for short. In my opinion, this new design is great and I will continue to shop at this store!